The Crown Jewels
The Lowry
Based on the true story of 17th Century Irish Rebel Thomas Blood (Aiden McArdle), and his attempt to steal The Crown Jewels from King Charles II (Al Murray), a play written by the person behind Men Behaving Badly and featuring some of Britain’s most critically acclaimed comedy performers should, in theory, result in an outstanding stage show full of satire and humour. In reality, this production is the antithesis of this.
Directed by Sean Foley, the cast list reads like a whose who of British comedy. Al Murray stars as both King Charles II and as Talbot Edwards, the Master of the Jewel House responsible for keeping the Crown Jewels safe. He is joined by Mel Giedroyc as Mrs Edwards / a member of the French nobility, Joe Thomas as Holcroft Blood and Neil Morrissey as Robert Perrot. The cast also includes Carrie Hope Fletcher as Elizabeth Edwards.
The premise for the play is intriguing. The attempted heist from The Tower of London offers the opportunity for plenty of humour, especially considering part of the actual heist failed due to the sceptre not fitting into the bag the conspirators had brought with them. Unfortunately, The Crown Jewels fails to find the funny elements in the original story and becomes a confused production that can’t even decide if it is a musical or a play.
The show begins with Carrie Hope Fletcher, as Lady of the Bedchamber, performing a song about the King’s greatness before emptying a chamber pot over the front row. There doesn’t appear to be any purpose to the musical number, nor the subsequent ones that she performs as Elizabeth Edwards, and with the exception of the final number there are no musical pieces by any other member of the cast. Given the publicity of the show as a comedy play, the musical piece is a confusing start to the show. Whilst her vocals are as fantastic as ever, they are misplaced within the show.
However, the main problem with this production is the reliance on xenophobic jokes and playground innuendo.
Throughout the show, there are numerous penis jokes. There’s only so many times that a sceptre and orb looking mildly phallic is funny, and that was very quickly exhausted. With each additional attempt at a joke, the number of people within the audience laughing dropped considerably.
Also throughout are references to how great Britain is, and how bad all other countries are. Rather than being a satirical look at other countries, these jokes grow increasingly xenophobic before culminating with a new national anthem performed by Carrie Hope Fletcher that wouldn’t have been out of place at a UKIP rally.
During the first act, Al Murray spent 10 minutes essentially performing a posh Pub Landlord sketch. Much of this relied on audience participation and Murray’s observation humour. Again though, this was quickly exhausted and many of Murray’s choices were questionable. Mocking members of the audience for wearing masks was a particular low point that was unfortunately then often repeated throughout the rest of the show.
Alongside Murray’s stand up routine, the show also features numerous callbacks to the work of the cast. Previous Great British Bakeoff host Mel Giedroyc spends a questionable amount of time explaining the virtues of themed baked goods and the perils of them not being stiff, whilst Neil Morrissey’s character appears to be a period dress version of his Men Behaving Badly character.
The actual premise of the play was quickly forgotten in favour of a variety show performance from Al Murray and Carrie Hope Fletcher. The heist elements that remained were glossed over so quickly and had a very mumbled delivery by the actors, particularly Aidan McCardle.
The play did serve to illustrate which of the performers were uncomfortable with improvisation and ad-lib. Murray is well versed in ad-libbing and seemed to delight in trying to throw the rest of the cast off. Mel Giedroyc and Neil Morrissey batted his comedic volleys back with ease, whereas Carrie Hope Fletcher looked instantly concerned. At one point, she stood fixed to the spot and looked completely checked out whilst Murray and Giedroyc attempted to make elephant-phallic jokes funny.
There was one person who absolutely shone in this production; Adonis Siddique. Playing a nervous footman who seems absolutely terrified of King Charles II, Siddique had perfect comic timing, was never afraid to pause to wait for the big laughs, and was essentially the saviour of the show. The one star of the review is reserved purely for his performance.
Needless to say, we wouldn’t recommend this show. From the number of people we saw leaving at the interval we are not along in that. We very nearly left at the interval but we’ve never walked out of a show before, and in all honesty didn’t want to give The Crown Jewels the accolade of being our first!
Originally posted: